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Sep 5, 2009

A commitment to self motivation, realization, and the eradication of procrastination.

We shall begin with a little introduction from the English Dictionary:

To Stagnate:
  1. to cease to run or flow; as water, air, etc.
  2. to become stale or foul from standing, such as a pool of water.
  3. to stop developing, growing, progressing, or advancing.
  4. to become sluggish and dull.
First off, I do not believe number one applies to me. Why, you may ask? Well, I am neither water nor air. Nor do I believe number two applies to me. Why, you may ask? Well, mostly because the simple act of standing doesn't make me stink. Nor does it attract mosquito's.
Number four seems to apply indirectly, but only because number three seems to hit the nail on the head.
When I started this blogging project, it first was a simple way to keep in touch with the family. We did "this" over the weekend, we did "that" the other day. But over time, it became a lot more to me. And suddenly it was an outlet for all sorts of written monologue. But now I find I have indeed become stagnant.
I just spent the last three hours in the car, and this was something I was thinking about quite a bit. Why has this happened? I can certainly speculate on a few things, working night shift has certainly cramped my writing style. But I have come to realize there are other factors at work here that I didn't realize at first.
Perhaps, not just my prose has stagnated, but physically I have as well (which I believe is leading to a mental stagnation, too). For example, I come home from work and take my boots off pretty much just vegetate. I might eat a little something, then I go to bed. I do my best to not wake up until I need to get up and get ready for work. I go to work, come home, and repeat.
Now, lets rewind the clock a little. Before the marriage, Wife and I were dedicated to losing weight, eating right, and getting in shape. And we set a goal to do this before we were married. This included nearly daily trips to the gym, eating a whole a lot better and reaping the benefits.
I was motivated, I had a lot to say, and I simply felt better about myself. Now, right now we are generally doing a good job of eating right, and my weight is reflecting this. However, I am horribly out of shape. My energy level is pretty much zero beyond what I must do. To put it more bluntly, I am a lazy cull.
So, this is my new goal. Actually, I have two (because in my mind, they go hand in hand):
  1. I am going back to the gym. Now, I have been telling myself this over the last couple of months, but to no avail. What is my motivation now? Don't know (at least its an honest answer). Aside from the obvious "it can't hurt me to be in better shape," I believe a more active person will have a more active mind. And as we have discussed a little, I have become boring and dull. And I can't let Wife realize how boring and dull I am, she might not find me so endearing (OK, that might be a slight exaggeration of the truth).
  2. At the suggestion of my good friend, LazzyBuddhist, I am committing to a full month of posting. Supposedly, this is going to be an exercises in creative writing. Forcing myself to producing something, anything, is better than the nothings I have been coming up with. And while my little following I have is fairly small, I had come to enjoy my posting more for myself than anything else.
So, its time to stop feeling sorry for myself, and start doing things that are tried and true methods for self motivation and improvement. And really, whats wrong with wanting to improve myself?

3 comments:

  1. Bravo! And I especially enjoy that you have totally and completely one-upped me by throwing in the whole going to the gym thing. Good thing I started this challenge, because if you had thrown down the gauntlet first with this whole posting PLUS gym thing, I would have slunk away, bought myself a bag of cheetos and glued myself to the tube.

    Good luck in your quest. I'm cheering you on.

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  2. Even when you feel "off" your game, you still write well. And Dad and I, being the exercise nuts that we are, really do see the difference between our morning workouts and missing a day. So take heart. Motivation to feel better can be a great incentive. More energy helps too. Good luck. And KEEP WRITING! We love to read your writings!

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  3. VOR -- I love you just the way you are, but then again having to take care of you in our old age because you didn't take care of yourself is unappealing. This is why I walk 5 days a week or so -- in hopes that it makes my old(er) age a bit more comfortable. Now, as I've said many a time -- if I croak when I'm 50 and could have spent all the time we do walking after working sitting around enjoying an adult beverage or a nice pint of Ben & Jerry's, I'll be one pissed dead person! But alas, as there is no way to be sure, I continue on. JM

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You went to all the trouble to get yourself here, you might as well say something about it.

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